20 Days: Quarantine
Last night, I went out with some friends to see the new movie, Quarantine. This movie is a remake of a Spanish movie called [REC] starring Jennifer Carpenter, also known as the potty-mouthed sister in Dexter. Let me just say that it was very odd to see this woman on screen for 89 minutes without hearing a single profanity from her mouth.
The movie is shot in Nausea Cam, my name for that process of shoting a movie with a soulder-mounted camera with absolutely NO steady cam use. Previous examples include The Blair Witch Project and Cloverfield. If you are prone to vertigo or motion sickness, take your Dramamine before seeing this movie. I, however, did not need to because I am not a giant pussy.
Jennifer Carpenter plays Angela Vidal, a reported for a local TV station doing a report on a night with the local fire company. This first part contains the only ntentional humor of the entire flick, and introduces us to Hollywood Horror Cast Template one which contains: spunky woman reporter, black guy (aka cameraman), macho sensitive guy who gets eaten in the last act, and super-macho libido man who gets eaten in the second act. Everyone introduced? Right.
The fire company gets a call a few hours, and many sexual innuendos, into the night and the truck exit, sirens a-blarin’. More inuendo ensues, and the fireteam enters arrives at an apartment building where there were reports of screaming.
Of course, the screaming was coming from a woman has since turned into a zombie-type, who proceeds to attack, eating a cop’s neck then throwing super-macho libido man down a 3-story stairwell. Hollywood Horror Cast Template, with the addition of a couple cops (now 1) and scared residents (read: zombie fodder) find that they have been quarantined in the building by the Center for Disease Control.
Things rapidly deteriorate as HHMC finds that those attacked are rising, posibly from the dead, though that’s not really explored in the film. What it does mean is that those attacked have gone crazy and start attacking the rapidly dwindling heroes. Around this point, we come to Unintentially Funny Movie Scene #1.
UFMC#1 gives us a camera perpective of the camearman beating a zombie to death with the very same camera. The effect this gives is of a mad old zombie woman headbutting herself to death on a recording camera lens. It is horribly funny and gory in the extreme! It was at this time that I was comforted by the knowledge that my $10 was not spent in vain.
HHMC tries several ways to get out of the building, met at every point with gun-toting CDC folk, ready to blow them to bits. HHMC is weeded down to three people, spunky reporter, macho sensitive guy who gets eaten in the last act, and black guy, and we now come to UFMC#2, when the last 3 are running up the stairs and the cameraman points the camera quickly down a hall as he’s running, sees a zombie right there, then lets out this weak little scream reminiscent of this sound clip from the Simpsons:
Sorry the video isn’t from the show, but it’s that “Aaah! Cobras!” that I was reminded of.
Well, we come to the point where macho sensitive fireman dies. Buh-bye! The last two make it to the basement where we see some newspaper clippings that give us hints as to how the whole zombie thing went down. I won’t ruin that for you. Black guy dies, and we’re left with the spunky reporter, who by this point is the gibbering, terrified reporter.
Sadly, if you’ve seen the advertisement for the movie, you’ve seen the end of the movie. I thouroughly enjoyed this flick. I got two good jumps, lots of creepy scenes, and a high body count. Hollywood did well with this remake!